Sirens

The lake had glazed over and the ice had hardened and grown thick that year without any snow at all, making the safest ice you could hope for. Lake Willoughby is by many considered the most beautiful winter lake in the area. This is because due to its depth it is the last lake in Vermont to freeze solid, mostly not before late January or early February and thus remains snow free even as most of the other lakes are covered under a harsh monotonous blanket of snow. The color of the ice of their lake changed with the moods of the clouds racing over the sky on a sunny day and could change from green to blue to black within the course of a few hours.
If you have ever walked on ice without snow cover you know it is like magic, like walking over a window into a strange world from which you are separated by just a few centimeters.
With patience, just before nightfall, and if like Vermont kids you are able to hold very still despite the cold, if you manage to be one with the frozen world without moving, the fish will come close to the surface of the ice and you can watch the burbot from above as about a dozen males and females form a writhing ball several feet in diameter and dance what looks like an agonizing devilish dance under water, rolling over the bottom of the shallows and muddying the waters under the black ice.
„Don´t forget,” said the father to Joe underneath his breath, before he started to pull up the hooks, “these burbot devils are creatures of the deep and yet the good Lord sends them up for us to be sustained through winter.”
They certainly looked devilish, thought Joe, their heads were flat, their large mouths with pursed lips contain several rows of small sharp teeth, but Joe who loved any living creature still felt sorry for them when they lay on the ice after their father had hauled them up skillfully. When their eyes broke and glazed over, separated from their world but by a few inches of frozen ice, even the grim appearance created by the barbel that hung from the lower jaw made them look pitiful to the boy.
But his father never failed to remind him that they were mighty strong predators, skimming the shallows for smaller and larger creatures to feast on, crayfish, perch, minnows and even landlocked salmon almost their own size. Fearless they are, he said, don´t pity them. And they will fight back when they have fallen prey to your bait and hooks.“
Father had woken Joe and Will in the afternoon when it was still light outside but the shade was starting to flow into the valley between the mountains and spilled over the dark ice like the schoolmaster´s dark blue ink.
This hour remained Uncle Joe´s most favorite time of a winter day until he got very old. If it coincided with a fading winter sun over Mount Hor to the West, Uncle Joe would absent himself from any kind of work he happened to be pursuing at the very moment and despite his beloved and feared wife Aunt Melissy´s stern glance he would walk down to the shore to gaze out into the illuminated blue valley that had replaced the silver rippled summer lake.
He would always come back home with far away eyes as if he had looked beyond the borders of what lay in the past and his usually twinkling eyes were calm and serene for the remainder of the day. Did he still then hear his father´s words, the words the old man had addressed to the brothers that winter night before they went ice fishing almost holding them back by the collar so eager had they been to get out there the first time that very winter?
 The father had warned them to spread their gear out evenly and orderly over a well organized area, under no circumstances were they to drop it all in one place in order to distribute the weight more evenly over the ice.
He had spoken with a stern voice, looking them into their eyes to ascertain they were listening, even though they had heard his speech many winters, time and again.
Joe remembered the grin Will gave him, as father was issuing his final warning before they were allowed to step out on to the ice: „Boys, listen up. If you fall through the ice, try not to panic. It´s just very cold water, nothing you are not used to. Turn toward the direction from which you came and carefully place your hands and arms on the unbroken surface, working your body forward onto the ice by kicking your feet. Once out, remain lying on the ice and do not stand up or you might fall through again, and then roll away from the hole. Roll or crawl back to your tracks until you return to solid ice.“
And thus they had ventured out, all three of them, Joe with his father, carrying his share of gear and keeping his eyes on the dark transparent surface of the ice while following in his father´s light steps. They quickly reached their respective camp places which were to be set up around  precut ice holes his father had maintained over the last few days.
Every once in a while Joe looked up to see Will´s small figure in the distance setting up camp at the second hole about a hundred feet away. Both Will and his father first took out a skimmer and carefully but forcefully broke the sheet of ice that had glazed over the newly cut hole during the last 6 hours since father had last been out and then fished out the ice fragments and the slush underneath that would continue forming over the course of the night. Joe´s father then handed over the skimmer to the boy who fastened it to his belt with a thin cord. It would be his chore to skim the ice slush out of his father´s fishing hole over the night while Will had to do his own. He had to do this gently so the burbot wouldn´t be scared off. It was an important chore.
The ground was clear ice under their feet and night was already settling in. This was the most beautiful hour when the ice was shimmering blue as if illuminated from within and the evening air was crisp and really cold but not deadly cold yet. Later the night it was one of the most important things to keep warm during the wait for the fish to take the bait as tiredness would overcome them but for now he was alert and excited. Every once in a while he cast a glance over to Will who went through the same motions as his father in setting up camp. Maybe next year Joe would have his own fishing hole a hundred feet off his father´s side too.
He looked up the cliff of Mount Pisgah along the east shore of the Lake. The cliff lay frostlocked and forbidden. In summer Will and he would scramble up through the woods and rocks again, and explore how the cliff´s surface, so familiar to them, had changed over the course of the winter by small landslides and rockfalls that blocked pathways from the previous summers or had created new ones, had felled small trees rolling by and littered fresh rock shards sharp as a knife´s blade over a glade. There was this one thing his father said repeatedly as the boys ventured out as he knew they must to become part of the land and endure its challenges despite their mother´s worries. He said that even a mountain was but a changeable thing in the sight of god, and Joe knew that to be true by all these changes that were mostly invisible to the untrained eye but that Will and he could spot from the road and that made them eager for spring time to find out more.
But despite all these changes, now, in the evening light, Mount Pisgah looked eternal as did Mount Hor on the other side, and Joe shivered and hurried to help his father with the last preparations. At home the boys had helped father to prepare the line with the set-line hooks and strips of dried fish. They had no live bait which would have worked even better but even burbot was hungry this time of year and the dried fish would do.
His father unrolled the set line gently into the ice fishing hole. The sinker helped to pull the line to the bottom quickly. Father secured the line around a strong spruce pole and made sure that enough weight was on the line. After that the long wait could start, and darkness would finally claim the ice valley save the two small lamps that were hung up at stakes next to the camp sides and would be the only way to signal to Will who would be all but invisible by his own fishing hole.
Joe could hear the ice working with clear cold sounds but his father was relaxed now and unhurried and so Joe knew they were safe and the ice was strong enough to bear their weight this night. He knew that even the moose would sometimes venture out on the ice once the lake was frozen though it happened from time to time that an animal would fall through the ice. Two winters ago father had found a frozen in moose calf in the lake not far from the shore and had worked very hard to free the frozen carcass to provide the family with meat for a long time. Every time that the family had had moose stew that winter, Joe who had been only ten years old then, had felt sad thinking of the poor calf who had fallen through and not managed to get out of the water in time, but father had said that the meat was a gift and that it had been a miracle too that the calf had not gone under before freezing into the ice. Joe hoped that the animals were smarter this year. He scanned the darkening shore line for the swiftly moving shapes of the creatures, glad to know that at least the bears were deep in their winter´s sleep until March and were not likely to bother them at their camp site.This year food was not so plentiful as it had been that winter two years ago when they had found the calf,. This year the family depended on the catch to survive winter without going hungry.
Underneath his feet the boy could now see slight movements and he knew this meant that the burbots had started their dances. For a moment he had a slight feeling of vertigo as he remembered an old fireside tale.
The old woman by the creek told the young ones who stopped by every once in a while to hear a good tale that it was absolutely necessary to look away immediately and call for the good god´s support if you ever spotted larger figures under the ice. Legend knew there were heartbreakingly beautiful heathen maids living in the lake who looked like humans save for a long silver fishtail instead of legs. They were said to smile up from their icy world especially at young men from underneath the glassy ice and try to lure them to the open hole to reach out and pull them into their dark cold world.
Joe´s mother had said that these stories were but old women´s fireside tales unfitting for young men like Joe and Will when he had asked her about it, but he had seen a shadow of fear in her eyes nonetheless. He thought that Will, being 15 now, certainly would not look away if a beautiful girl was ever to smile at him, and neither would he.

 

loopholes and the art of legislation

Image - Version 2When we arrived at the cottage we were basically frozen. Courtesy demanded to offer someone who came to the cottage door a cup of tea – but I would have offered it regardless of etiquette because the girl was in need of one. She gladly accepted and entered the cottage. The old people were at the Sunday meeting still and so I got busy rekindling the hearth fire and put on a kettle with fresh water to boil. I knew Aunt Melissy would approve of the church elder’s daughters having tea with me.

The girl had readily slipped into the bench at the window and had pulled her sock feet up to wrap her long skirt around them to warm up. As long as the fire wasn’t going it wasn’t too warm in the cottage either, but it was nicer than outside, and my feet started thawing.

The girl had put her chin on her kneecaps and looked at me without much expression, a bit as if we had been friends for a while. After a moment she lifted her head a bit and said: “I’m Fiona. Don’t tell me your name. My mom says I shouldn’t know you. So, if you don’t tell me your name I don’t know you, right. “ Fiona grinned. “She didn’t say we couldn’t have tea.”

She hugged her legs tight, I could see she was still cold. But there was something on her mind. As long as we were alone. “It’s difficult, to make rules.” She added gravely. As if she was not the one looking for loopholes. Or maybe as if looking for loopholes was her special function in the system of making good rules. “I mean,” she added “to make rules that are to be followed to a point. Not to forget anything. Though you know they will be looking for a loophole. And you have to make the rule as tight as possible. But still workable.” She took a deep breath. I had no idea where she was coming from. Why she was telling me this?

“Why would they?”, I asked. “Why would they look for loopholes, I mean.” Maybe it was an ignorant question but it was the first thing that came to my mind. I didn’t even now who “they” were supposed to be. “Why wouldn’t they?” Fiona retorted. “Doesn’t everybody crave freedom? Just everybody? And especially those who are bound by a contract to obedience?”

One second of eternity at Lake Willoughby

IMGP1041Lake Willoughby, grated into plutonic rock by a deep glacier, is a 300 feet deep, water filled scar between two mountains with biblical names, Mount Hor to the West and the Eastern Mount Pisgah. If you stand on the North Shore of the lake, it actually has the appearance of a deep fjord, though there is no outlet to the sea. Instead there is said to be an underground aquifer connecting the basin of Lake Willoughby to that of another eerie body of water beyond Mount Hor, Crystal Lake. In my mind that acquifer had the form of a water filled cathedral, in my mind I saw swimmers gliding swiftly through a space abandoned by a people even older than they were. There was an incredible, inexplicable light the way I imaged this. You have to keep in mind that I imagined this within a dream without actually seeing it, two steps down and under. Even though my sober mind took offense with the inexplicability of the light.

While I was thinking and conjuring up images within the dream I stood at the waters edge of the lake as I had done many summers and the water exactly like the water of lake Willoughby as I remembered it acted like a mirror. The surface seemed to be like a sheet of glass of finest quality, separating the clearly visible underneath from the still world above, and the mirror image of this world like an incomprehensible fourth dimension in between both worlds. Again I saw the forms in the distance, gathering around precariously piled up, submerged boulders. Each winter these boulders avalanche down Mount Pisgah and roll into the lake to form the outline of an inaccessible stone city, creating an intricate mountainous terrain. I wondered how long it would take to fill the deep ravine of the lake with boulders and fleetingly thought of the old story about the small bird wearing away a mountain with his beak to mark the passing of the first second of eternity. In my dream I had this thought.

deep blue pride / from my new novel (nasciturus pro iam nato habetur, quotiens de commodius eius agitur)

IMG_2442One day Aunt Melissy, Uncle Joe and a I had been invited to an assembly on a Sunday after church to the church elder and his wife. The men and boys were gathering in the meeting hall of the church while the womenfolk were expected to assemble at the church elder’s house. His wife was entertaining us with cake and good strong smelling coffee in her dining room that was big enough to fit at least twenty people at the table and then some around the benches placed at the wall. Even at such a gathering  there was no idle chatter but the women discussed who in the community was in need of support or charity and how the community should cooperate to provide it. The girls were clearly as bored as any girl at any time would have been even though I was sure they were working as hard and obediently as I was. We were all seated alongside the wall on the benches, holding on to our mugs and a piece of cake. I exchanged glances with a girl about my age who was seated across the table at the other wall. The girl seemed strangely familiar but I could not place her face. She was dressed just a bit prettier than the other girls and in fact she was a bit prettier than everybody else.  After we had finished our coffee she got up, left the room and returned with a tray to collect our mugs and the dishes we had been balancing on our knees. When she took mine she made a funny face at me, and the girl next to me giggled. I couldn’t tell whether she had been laughing at me or about me but the pretty girl had already filled her tray and carried it out of the room. When she came back into the room she did not reclaim her seat on the bench but stood next to the state elder’s wife, her hands neatly folded in front of her apron and  waiting to be allowed to address the woman sitting at the table. Finally, her mother decided to look up and notice her. As soon as her eyes found her daughter’s smile you could see the smallest glimpse of pleasure and pride you will ever catch in another person’s face. I looked at Aunt Melissy. Nothing much escaped her sharp birdlike eyes and, sure enough, she was squinting her eyes in the familiar way she displayed only when she was alarmed by some misbehavior while observing elder’s wife intently. The lady was well trained though and the moment of satisfaction with her daughter’s beauty and well-displayed training had passed quickly and had been replaced with the usual sober inquiry she met everyone in her church with, never letting on that she was the first lady of the community. I think that in this moment though I knew that behind all of this admirable display of virtue people were as they are through all times – well meaning at their best, proud and ambitious underneath, full of insecurity and doubt. Maybe even Aunt Melissy knew some of these feelings. I looked at her. Nah, not Aunt Melissy, I corrected myself. Maybe every hundred years or so somebody came along who was actually virtuous and good to a fault. In this room I knew this one person not to be the church elders’ wife  but Aunt Melissy.

Aunt Melissy and Uncle Joe

Image - Version 2

Uncle Joe was as talkative as his wife was quiet – but she had a quick wit, accentuating his stories with dry remarks that he returned with good natured smiles. “The smartest girl in the Northern County she was”, he would sometimes say, “and imagine, she agreed to marry me! But only after I cut my beard and swore off tobacco. She would not have had me otherwise, and I have become a better man for it. “

As I started to get stronger and could sit up in bed, still wrapped up in the blankets, Uncle Joe would entertain me with outrageously funny stories of his youth. He was given to enraptured fits of laughter triggered by his own jokes. When he got too carried away with his stories, Aunt Melissy would look up from her work – for she was never idle – and comment sternly: “Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few.” Then Uncle Joe smiled good-naturedly and continued his story with just as much zest while Aunt Melissy continued with her chores as if the words had not been spoken. Only on Sundays she did not tolerate his spinning of tales but insisted on bible study and quiet prayer and he obeyed her without complaint.

I have never again met a husband and wife who seemed so comfortable in their home and so content with their life and each other. Despite his stockiness Uncle Joe was quick to jump up like a cat when Aunt Melissy entered the cottage and eager to please her with some little errand or kindness. She returned his pleasantries with home baked goods and fragrant meals. Her only love besides Uncle Joe were the snow white chicken in her yard for which she was known in the county. Aunt Melissy and her white hens. Children they had none.

She seemed to be right out of a historical reenactment society

 

I was so completely startled by this sudden change in behavior that I wasn’t even shocked to feel a hand grabbing my shoulder and yanking me down from my boulder and back to shore.
The hand was firm and muscular. It dragged me away from the shore a few steps, beyond the tree line and I had to oblige, stumbling backwards. When we reached the shelter of the tree, the hand let go. I turned around. The strong and determined grip had been misleading. Standing in front of me, inspecting me gravely with birdlike, black eyes, was a tiny, old woman. She wore a long rough shirt with an apron over a grey flannel shirt. Snow white hair done up in a tidy bun, her narrow shoulders wrapped in a grey woolen, triangular shawl, she seemed to be right out of a historical reenactment society. “And what did you think you were doing there, laddie,” she inquired with an authoritative voice. Apparently she mistook me for a boy, addressing me as laddie. “Speak up,” she demanded, quite clearly being used to be obeyed immediately and not one prone to put up with any nonsense. I shivered. She stepped closer again, then reached out and pushed my tangled hair out of my face. Taking a sharp look at my face she murmured to herself: “In a bad shape we are, aren’t we.” And inspecting me a few more moments she added: “A girl in a lad’s clothes, if I ever saw such a thing, lost too, I take it.” She put her hand on my forehead. I started shaking violently. “You are burning up,” she observed, again more to herself than to me. If I had had any more strength left in me, I might have inquired right there and then why she had yanked me away from the boulder. If I had been in my own time and place, I would have protested most decidedly about being ordered about by a woman who was a complete stranger to me. But here I was, meek, shivering with fever and cold and lost. The tiny lady took off her shawl and wrapped it around my shoulders. “That’s more like it,” she stated grimly, referring to my state of clothing, I am sure. Then she simply took my hand and pulled me along.

Woe to the unfortunate stranger who should come upon the gate they were keeping

For a brief moment also I did wonder now whether I was still dreaming. Yet the wet sand, the sea gulls of the lake circling overhead, the light on the water, the dark blue reflections of the two adjacent Mountains, Mount Hor and Mount Pisgah, in the misty mirror of the lake on the distant Southern shore, everything had a coherence that was not dreamlike. And yet the situation was surreal, not only because I had fallen asleep on my bed and woken up on a wet, cold beach hundreds of miles away from home. The sun, for example, was incredibly small, too small for our planet, planet earth. In the east the sharp crescent of a waxing moon, greeting the morning with disdain, was accompanied by a second crescent, a twin moon. And the surface underneath me was still breathing. And yet I knew the silhouettes of the twin peaks by heart. My mother used to tell us on warm summer nights, when the sun had already left the sky and only the patient outlines of the rock formations on both sides of the lake were still cutting into the advancing darkness, that the mountains were ancient guardians who were forgotten by their masters and not having been relieved of their duty had decided to keep their post to the edge of doom. Woe to the unfortunate stranger who should come upon the gate they were keeping. Lake Willoughby was an incredibly deep, glacial, water filled ravine, and there was some sparse folk lore about creatures living in the dark, about a connecting underground acquifer between the lake and its twin lake, Crystal Lake, to the West behind Mount Hor. It was a strange place, but being as remote had kept all stories at bay.

I sat still for a while, waiting for the scenery to change or disappear like dream images do, especially if you pay too much attention to the details, but the situation was as real as you can imagine, and not prone to change any more than Ms. Havenshire’s classroom during an especially tedious lecture on a philosophical concept that excited her. I stared around for a while, bravely ignoring the piercing cold, trying to take an inventory of everything. Except for the strange planetary constellations, the lake seemed real. I had never been up here in fall but I imagined it to look as lonely and cold as it did now. It is not exactly a lively place even in summer. And in winter, once the snow started, it would be one of those places that were cut off from the outside world for weeks on end, alas with the local people being prepared for it and not disconcerted by a few inches more or less of snow or even by massive boulders coming thundering down the mountains just like every winter. There was no skiing and therefore no seasonal dwellers in winter. Both, Mount Hor and Mount Pisgah were too steep and fully covered with trees.

I was shivering violently now, my clothes were as damp as if I had actually spent the night unprotected on the beach. When I finally stumbled up to my feet, it took me a moment to find my balance just as it would have on a big gym mat. I tried to disregard the breathing of the surface and made a few gingerly placed steps towards the water. What to do next? What to do if you are suddenly stranded in a place without any preparation or at least warning? Why was I here? In a dream, typically, events keep unfolding and you keep reacting but the lake was quiet with quick shadows dancing over the surface. I stopped at the water’s edge. Little waves arrived at the shore with a sweet sound. Light was dancing silver on the ripples. I was getting colder by the second, shaking most convincingly.

I had to find shelter. There was a colony of summer cottages at the North Beach, they would be boarded up for the winter, but maybe I could find a way in all the same to warm up and think. It seemed a reasonable plan, if you can at all call it reasonable that you have to think about finding shelter in a dream. Again I asked myself what I would do once I got inside. Maybe there would be a phone but even if there was, it probably would be disconnected for winter. Would it even make sense to call home and ask for someone to please come and rescue me? How ever to explain how I got here? And would it be possible to call home even if I found a working phone? I turned around to scan the tidy row of vacation cottages at the North Shore to find one that would suit my improvised plan and I faced an impenetrable row of trees. The cottages were gone.

the earth itself, underneath my body, was a breathing organism, like a gigantic whale you find yourself stranded on

How hard my mind had to work to keep control, to still try to make sense out of a wealth on information that had long stopped to be apprehensible by any rules I had been led to understand applied. But only submission to the world of grown-ups would have you believe that they were – in general – truthful about the world. I didn’t believe this anymore but tried to rely on my own senses instead. It was treacherous ground.

For example that night. As I lay in the dark, eyes closed though wide awake, the surface of my bed felt soft as was to be expected, but it felt soft in the way I had experienced and shied away from before. It seemed to be soft in an organic, breathing way. I tried to distinguish between my own breathing pattern and the breathing of that soft, pliable surface I felt underneath my body.  It was an uncanny feeling – but just ask yourself how many sensations you can really clearly distinguish besides soft and hard, warm and cold, pain and pleasure. Truth is, you constantly rely on additional sensations and context to tell you about the thing you are experiencing through just one of your senses to make sense of something.

What was it that I was feeling? Something that I feared, but I didn’t know why I feared it or whether I had reason to fear it in the first place as I was completely unaware of its nature. All I knew was that last time I checked my bed had not been breathing. As before it felt actually – and it made perfect sense to think those words as irrational as they might seem – that the earth itself, underneath my feet, my body, was a breathing organism, like a gigantic whale you find yourself stranded on. It didn’t make sense and I couldn’t explain to myself where that strange idea actually orginated. Nothing I had read or talked about lately had pointed in that direction. Remember, there was no internet and but little TV. None in our house, by the way.

And yet, I just felt it, right there and then, the surface underneath me belonged to something alive, and I knew I had to open my eyes to find out what was going on, but I was entirely too scared to live up to my own imaginative ability. All I could manage to do, pathetically,  was to continue breathing slowly just as I had done during those long ago nights when I had led some non-existing intruder to believe that I was asleep. And with each moment the sensation of a sighing, breathing surface underneath my body was getting stronger.

cat doors and space time

How did he get in? The same way he got out, I guess. Slowly, really feeling borderline silly, I got down on all fours and crawled to the cat door. My legs felt heavy and cold and as the circulation started to work again were starting to tingle. I ignored them and bent my face down to the cat door as if I was a cat. Of course I knew that I wouldn’t fit through the small opening, just wide enough for Plinius, not even, after some adjustments, wide enough for the neighborhood raccoon who, attracted by Plinius cat food bowl, had twice raided the kitchen. I felt cold night air on my hand pushing up the slot and then on my face. I pushed closer to the opening and peeked out.

I felt like Alice in Wonderland after she had tumbled down the rabbit hole. I could see Plinius’ world bright and clear. Too bright actually. There was daylight out there, in front of my kitchen door, bright sun light reflected off the silver ripples of the lake. Plinius sat, back to me, at the shore, and washed his coat thoroughly with his cat tongue as if to cleanse himself of my human touch. I knew the lake by the characteristic shape of the mountains that surrounded it. The place existed. Only it was not in my backyard where I had, only moments before, watched Plinius through the doorglass as he was diving into the night. The lake glaring in the sunlight was far up in Vermont, Lake Willoughby, a deep glacial body of water wedged between two mountains with biblical names where my mother, Phoebe and I had spent our summer. I had not the first idea why I would see it through the cat door.

Plinius seemed to think nothing of it, and he just continued to lick his lower back, proceeding systematically to the tail. He paid no attention to me and would not have either if he had cleaned himself on the kitchen rug behind me. I turned back for a reality check, back to see the night kitchen in my own house, closing the cat door gently as if to protect the night in my house from that other wordly daylight. Or the daylight out there from the night leaking out of a cat door in my world. Because in my spacetime it was still night, my kitchen was still dark except for the weak glow of the night light.

Out there where Plinius roamed, it was not only bright day but an entirely different geographical place altogether. Not New Humble Jersey. I pressed my face again the cat door again. Plinius had taken advantage of my distraction and had removed himself from the scene. It was dark out there, the smooth, velveteen darkness of our own backyard. In the distance over the black leaved silhouettes of the tree tops I could see a star. My own backyard and starlight traveling over a distance of 430 light years.

Mount Hor

Lake Willoughby grated into plutonic rock by a deep glacier, is a 300 feet deep, water filled scar between two mountains with biblical names, Mount Hor to the West and the Eastern Mount Pisgah. If you stand on the North Shore of the lake, it actually has the appearance of a deep fjord, though there is no outlet to the sea. Instead there is said to be an underground aquifer connecting the basin of Lake Willoughby to that of another eerie body of water beyond Mount Hor, Crystal Lake.
In my dream the water acted like a mirror. The surface seemed to be like a sheet of glass of finest quality, separating the clearly visible underneath from the still world above, and the mirror image of this world like an incomprehensible fourth dimension in between both worlds. Again I saw the forms in the distance, gathering around precariously piled up, submerged boulders. Each winter these boulders avalanche down Mount Pisgah and roll into the lake to form the outline of an inaccessible stone city, creating an intricate mountainous terrain. I wondered how long it would take to fill the deep ravine of the lake with boulders and fleetingly thought of the old story about the small bird wearing away a mountain with his beak to mark the passing of the first second of eternity. In my dream I had this thought.